Thursday, February 11

fake pregnancy

Yesterday I saw a commercial for this item:


Last night I had a dream that I used this First Response Gold digital test 3 times within two days and each time it said "YES." Still dreaming, I told Gina about it and she asked me if it was possible and I had to really think about it. I told her I couldn't remember. Then I went off about how it gets cloudy when you kiss people and sometimes you can't remember because it gets cloudy.

Monday, February 8

Reminiscent






I like work :)

I am getting to know the 5th grade kids that I read with, practice math facts with, etc.

Me: Do you have any brothers or sisters?
K: No.
Me: So you are the only child?
she thinks for a few seconds...
K: No, I do have brothers and a sister but none with opposable thumbs.
Me: What are their names?
K: Daisy, Timber and Mika

I don't ask about the thumbs because I don't want to be rude...

Later in the conversation:
Me: What do you like to do for fun
K: go dog sledding
Me: Oh you go dog sledding? With your dogs?
K: Yeah with Mika
Me: Oh so your brothers and sisters are your dogs?
K: Yes.
Me: What is your favorite food?
K: Sushi.

This girl rocks.

Thursday, February 4

Oh how we love facebook

because it puts ideas in my head. Like, "hey, type your name at urbandictionary.com and see what it says!"

So I do. it has 3 definitions. The first one:
"The nicest girl in the room. Everyone is drawn to her because of her beauty and her radiance."

The second one is offensive.

but then I feel all better with the last definition:
"Usually one who plays with Dora the Explorer, and sings Hannah Montana."

I would have to agree.

Wednesday, February 3

Just life at the moment.

I am an aide at the school that I love.
My sister and I have already had a pretend fight in the hall...the assistant principal walked by. Hey, this is what they get for nepotism. Jk I really am legit.

rofl Gina just walked in with half her FACE numb because she just got back from the dentist.
"mom I don't fing duh twee was wun ovuh by duh conswucion...oh cwap." (mom i don't think the tree was run over by the construction...oh crap)
"dat's wasads bagg!" (that's wasatch back...referring to the weather forecast)
I couldn't stop laughing.
"staub!" (stop)

Watching Emma and loving it. I have to wait till Sunday for the final episode. Those jerks at Masterpiece Classics better watch it!

I am starting this diet thing...started yesterday. I did it last summer and was very successful. but there are side effects which include but are not limited to: anger, desire to commit homicide, brief episodes of drama, and vertigo. Because I love food so much but I have to control that love. So sorry in advance. NO I am not on drugs.

Saturday, January 30

payday

Yesterday I received my first paycheck since my custodial job in August. I went straight to the bank and deposited it. What a beautiful feeling it is to have an income!


And yes I did start substituting December 5th and yes it took them this long to give me my first paycheck :) The anticipation and impatience made this occasion even better.

Friday, January 29

The Rotation System



I was helping my mom sift through her closet, giving up half of her clothes to DI. The determinig factor when I give stuff away to DI is "have I worn this in the past year?" and "Has it survived the rotation system?"

Rotation system? You may wonder.

It's brilliant. And I didn't think much of it until I told my mom about it. It's just one of the quirky things I do that is so normal to me, ya know?
  • I organize my clothing into sections, as I am sure all of you do: a pants section, a skirt/dress section, and a shirt/blouse/tops section.
  • I have my pants on the left side and my shirts on the right side.
  • I wear what is closest to the middle...or as close to the middle as possible...can't wear brown pants with a bright green shirt ya know!
  • After wearing that, I place it in the back of that section. So the pants would go behind all the other pants and the shirt would go behind all the shirts, farthest from the middle.
  • When I do my wash, I place all those clothes in the back of their sections because I have recently worn them and the other clothes need a chance now!
  • When I find a shirt is staying in the middle for a while and I never want to wear it, it goes to DI! Unless it's like fancy then it goes to the unrotated very very back section. Everyone has those right? hahaha lol. yeah you are totally saying "oh my gosh I have that too!"
  • Same with Sunday skirts/dresses. The rotation system is my favorite for Sunday clothes because I can go to church confidently, knowing what I wore last week is not to be worn again for a while!
You need to try it. It really works. Dudes can use it for hats and ties and even socks as well! You can use it for anything! Celebs should use it to rotate through their houses and cars! Use it with the cereal you eat! The friends you hang out with! JK please don't.

And if you don't want to do this for yourself, do it for your clothes. because think how you would feel if you were a shirt always in the back of your closet. The rotation system would be your only hope to get worn.

Wednesday, January 27

My sister made the herald!

Yay for Gina! Finally in the spotlight after working all these years at a title I school. Congratulations, sister!

Monday, January 25

Masterpiece Classics: Emma

YAY! Emma was on last night and my mommy recorded it! I can't wait to watch it. Masterpiece Classics are dumb when that lady talks in the beginning but they are really actually quite good if you just fast-forward through it.

Next time Emma is on: Tues at 2am

So you can watch it recorded at my house if you want.

Thursday, January 21

Conversation between my sister and I on the phone

Me: "Your piano students are here"
Gina: "Well I'm just down the road"
Me: "Well hurry UP"
Gina: "Make me some nachos."
Me: burp, hang up.

Typical of our conversations. Now that I think of it, I can't remember the last time one of us hasn't hung up on the other to end our phone conversations. I used to get offended, but now I think it's endearing and fun.

I'm gonna go make some nachos.

blind date gone blurry

My dear friend Alisa* called me up and told me I was going on a blind date with her date's roommate. We were going country dancing.

I don't dance very well when I'm limited to certain steps.
I don't dance very well when I'm attached to another human.
So I assumed my date would help me out and know what he's doing when it comes to dancing.

When I went to answer the door, I found Alisa, her date, and my date at the doorstep. Alisa attacked me first, then I saw the next closest person to the door. Alisa introduced him and I thought he was my date. Well he wasn't. He's her FIANCE. So I scream and get really happy! I had no idea she was even dating anyone. I turn around to see my date, at the bottom of the steps, being distant and quiet.

We walk to the car, he opens the door for me, so I sit in the seat. Well he started coming in too, so I scooted over just in time before he sat on me. On the way there he sat quietly while I talked in my high pitched excited voice to Alisa and her fiance that I had never met. Adam has been home six months, they have only dated 2 weeks, and they will be married june 21. "Good Alisa, you got him right off the mission, before he gets into porn." I took it back right after I said it. I am so AWKWARD!

Then I turn to my date "Is it Derek or Daron?"
"Daron"
"My brother's name is Daron."
no comment.

I asked him a few more questions, he's an electrical engineer major from New Mexico. He has 4 sisters and 8 nieces and nephews.

We got to the dance and Alisa and Adam ran off alone, leaving me with Daron. They came back and taught us a basic step, which we danced over and over redundantly for the next few songs. I wanted to die. I took over and led sometimes, spinning myself :)
We couldn't hear each other over the music, so we didn't talk. But one time I yelled "DO YOU EVEN LIKE COUNTRY MUSIC?"
"WHAT?"
I repeated the question.
he shook his head.
"ME NEITHER"
5 minutes later he asked "DO YOU LIKE COUNTRY MUSIC?"

On the way to the car we were talking about glasses/contacts.
to my date: "do you wear contacts?"
"no, but I should. I prefer having everything a little blurry"
"so you like not being about to see clearly?"
"yes"



On the way home, Daron quietly declares "I need ice cream."
I was the only one who heard him.
5 minutes later Adam said "Daron, did you say something?
me: "He wants ice cream"
Dairy queen was closed
We pulled into Wendy's
Daron: "I want McDonalds"
so we went to McDonalds
Alisa: "I'm partially lactose intolerant"
me: "me too"
so we ordered the 2 apple pies for $1
I got up to get napkins and when I returned there was a second straw in Daron's shake, pointed towards me.
me: "is that for me"
daron: "I have nothing to do with that."
Adam snickers

all four of us walked up to my door step and I hugged each of them.
Yay for blind dates.

*names have been changed

Tuesday, January 19

Nibbles



We caught him.
I saw the live mouse trap door closed (see picture in earlier post) and picked it up, tilted it from side to side, and DEFINITELY there was something in there. I was POSITIVE.

Well my dad was the only other person home so he drove me to the cemetery to set him free. So it felt like dejavu pulling out of the driveway, live mouse trap in hand, pulling up to cemetery, opening the trap door...waiting....

and he JUMPED out! and he was off to new adventures.

Driving home I was looking for reassurance that Nibbles would be ok.
"He won't freeze or go hungry, right? He'll find other mice to be friends with and they'll find plenty of seeds and dried fruits."
Dad: "Yes, he'll find friends. There's plenty of hawks, coyotes, and fox that'll find him."

Thanks, dad. At least the death of Nibbles isn't my fault though, right? his blood will be on the paws or claws of another.

Tuesday, January 12

Newsflash!

I got a job as a flex aide at Westmore! (where my sister works!) I am waiting to hear back when I start and what hours. But isn't that so exciting???

I also switched to my old ward! I am already loving it.

I am quite ready to get out of this town. Well isn't that a coincidence, because I am going to Zions National Park this weekend with friends! It will be so nice to get away and be a little warmer :)



I am going to see The Young Victoria a second time this week. Thank you, Veronica, for suggesting it because I wouldn't have thought the 30 min drive would be worth it! But it's worth it. and I'm making that drive again. and probably a third time.



Who would have thought Ruthie "pigface" draper from Dan in Real life and the mean old secretary from Devil Wears Prada could be Queen Victoria? And heartbreaker Mr. Wickham from Pride and Prejudice is Prince Albert? Well get used to it. because it's great.

If you'd like to join me and my friends, we're going to the Thursday matinee. Phone me.

Saturday, January 9

a histerical mouse trapping

almost like a histerical pregnancy, but this has to do with mice. And live mouse traps. So not really like a pregnancy huh.

My mom and I went to Lowe's yesterday and got a live mouse trap. We've seen this mouse (we named him Nibbles) and you know how it is. Once you've named an animal, you can't kill him.

We usually see him at night, running from our pantry to underneath the oven. I actually had a dream about seeing him dancing in front of the oven, and instead of running away, he just let me lie down next to him and clap as he performed. The next thing I knew, I was petting him and cuddling him. And all of a sudden, he wasn't a cute little mouse anymore, he was the size of a cat.

So dreams and names have brought on this emotional attachment that could break my heart should his life be taken. So live mouse trap it is for our lil Nibbles.

I placed some peanut butter (organic kirkland signature, my dad's favorite!) in the very back and set up this clever mouse trap next to the oven. Well tonight. guess what. The door to the mouse trap was shut, enclosing Nibbles!

I lifted the heavy plastic container and got in the car with Gina, who chauffeured Nibbles and I to the cemetery on a hill, my favorite place in town.
"Oh my gosh!"
"what?" Gina wondered.
"I feel him moving!"
We approached the entrance to the cemetery and began looking for just the right spot. Gina put on her brights, lighting a cozy snowless little nook of trees and tall grass. I walked to the aforementioned place, carefully opened the contraption and waited. Nothing. What a scared little mousy! Then I tipped it upside down. Then I tried to look inside. I thought I saw something, but...nope.

Just the peanut butter.

Lil Nibbles tricked us all! He's still in our house. Mom said she heard him playing near the toys this morning so maybe he took a vacation from neath the oven. We'll catch you though, and give you a better home, Mr. Nibbles!

Dad in purple pants

I had a dream that I came down the stairs to find my dad wearing my purple pants. I looked at him with confusion, then he laughed and said "I just thought I'd borrow them to wear today!" So we laughed together. Then he did a dance as we kept laughing.

Tuesday, January 5

How did it go?

it went.


I like that answer to that question. so clever.
my car has no heater, so as I was breathing on my way to american fork to substitute today, I could see my breath. because the car was not warm after 20 minutes of driving and that is just how it goes. It snows, it goes.
Interview #4, and four is my lucky number, so I am going to get this one. 6th grade teacher.

Monday, January 4

A new year, a new me.

I have so many resolutions and already this year is fantastic!
  • One of my resolutions is to stop disliking people, or at least pretend I love everyone until I do get to that point.
  • Another resolution I have is to be creative in my exercise routines so I will enjoy being active. If that is even possible. I guess we'll find out.
  • And the last one I'll share with you is to be in the black this year! That means, according to dictionary.com, "operating at a profit or being out of debt (opposed to in the red)"
I am going to love this year! Last year is going to be really hard to compete with, what with going to New Zealand, kissing boys, and graduating! But I know I am going to love this year! I'm just going to keep saying it!

Sunday, December 27

that last post was depressing

so I'll give you a glimpse of my wonderful christmas. it really was one of the best ever. just enjoyable family times, simple, effortless, (that's a lie, but every effort was worth it) christmas.

Fondue. need I say more? rye bread dipped in cheese fondue. all the shrimp you could possible shove on the stick and still have them immersed in the hot oil. then chocolate fondue. I made angel food cake. taking it out of the metal wrap, I had the cake in one hand. not a firm grip, ya know? You always have to be on guard though, carrying anything when my brothers are around. and this is why. my brother nudged me just a tad. angel food cake turned devil. fell on the floor. of course I just picked up the used to be light, fluffy cake and broke it into bite-size pieces and of course we dipped the smashed goodness into the chocolate fondant. "Isn't this supposed to be more airy?" the murderer asked sarcastically.

Arrangements were made in the basement and the entire family stomped down the stairs to watch...the 9 grandchildren put on a nativity scene. I have never seen them all just...ya know...be calm. And they all were, each one acted their part in almost reverence. it was the bombest thing I saw this Christmas. The true meaning of Christmas, portrayed by the most Christ-like of all of us.

Then the look on my brother's face Christmas morning, when he unwrapped the gift Gina and I had bought him. It was a duffel bag he specifically asked us to get him, really the only thing he wanted for christmas. and since his wife, santa, and mom already got him something else, we were his last resort. He used all his manipulation tactics to get gina and I to show a hint of evidence that we got it for him. "Hey I saw you at Costco this week" was one of them. well he failed. and he honestly thought we didn't get him the bag. So that priceless reaction of pure surprise was truly a gift.

and I got everything I wanted and for the first time I can ever remember, I am not taking anything back to return. It's been a very merry week!

feel better now? I do.

It's just an awkward week.

today I found myself in the middle of saying "Merry Christmas," feeling really awkward, and not remembering what the next holiday was (New Years) so I ended up sounding like this:

"Merry Chrim---uhh...yeah."
5 seconds later
"Happy New Year!"

Close your eyes and envision with me for a sec. I guess you need to keep your eyes open to read, but after you read this post, close your eyes and imagine.

You have been done with school since Thanksgiving break. Since then, you've worked a total of 5 days...so not much going on. Then you got another week of "break" then you don't really know how often you'll be substituting when the "break" ends. So for all I know, I'll be on a break until I get a real job. no offense, substitute office. K now close your eyes and imagine. how crazy. I am going to be. you might say "that sounds nice, a long break. I really need one of those" no, you don't. too much break = broken

Tuesday, December 22

deck the halls with gasoline

I have been the runner up three times for teaching jobs.

I just found out about the third one and now this is my status:

Deck the halls with gasoline Falalalalalalalala
Light a match and watch it gleam Falalalalalalalala
Watch the school burn down to ashes Falalalalalalalala
Aren't you glad you played with matches? Falalalalalalalala!

When I sang it to my dad and told him it was my facebook status, his automatic, serious response was: "if the school burns down tonight, you'll be responsible! Your status will be all over the papers"

Saturday, December 19

winning the hearts of the nieces and nephs



Lately I've been trying to be the aunt to my nieces an nephews that I'd want for myself. So I think back to the things I didn't like about my aunts and I have mostly good memories but the only bad memories are them telling me what to do. (as a little one, I like when they tell me what to do now.)

Well it's really hard to not tell a child what to do. Really. difficult. They aren't my kids! but the fact that I have this degree in telling chillens what to do makes it harder.

It actually works though. The less I tell them what to do the more they want to be my friend.

Tuesday, December 15

500 days of summer

was even better the second time.

Monday, December 14

This lady's Christmas decorations made my year

"Good news is that I truly outdid myself this year with my Christmas decorations. The bad news is that I had to take him down after 2 days. I had more people come screaming up to my house than ever. Great stories. But two things made me take it down:
"First, the cops advised me that it would cause traffic accidents as they almost wrecked when they drove by.
"Second, a 55 year old lady grabbed the 75 pound ladder and almost killed herself putting it against my house and didn't realize it was fake until she climbed to the top (she was not happy). By the way, she was one of many people who attempted to do that.
"My yard couldn't take it either. I have more than a few tire tracks where people literally drove up my yard."

Tuesday, December 8

Oh come on,

Really?

I drove to highland twice yesterday.
Once for the first interview
back for the second!
one of two candidates.
Exciting, right?
Wow I totally got it, right?

nope.
Want to know how I found out?
An automated email the district sends when they close a job.

The song from wedding singer, "kill me" comes to mind. with replacement words for the swear words of course. don't look it up.

I'm ok. That class had 34 kids in it anyway. I don't want that! plus this gives me OPTIONS to live outside of this place I've lived for decades! So I'm looking into that.

Something to think about.

Is loving someone like making a new horcrux where you split your soul?

Thursday, December 3

Tissue alert, nerd alert

Okay I realize that the only two things I post about are a. my dad or b. schoolish/kids stuff.

But those are the only interesting parts of my life so once I get more interesting things I'll talk about those things too. mmk?

a few years ago, as far as I can remember, there hasn't been a roll of toilet paper in our house. No toilet paper, just the empty metal roller.
A friend that has never been to my house before calls behind the closed bathroom door: "I'm out of toilet paper in here!"
Me: "Just use the kleenex!"
My dad prefers kleenex.
It's cheaper.
It's harder to not go crazy; you'll never use an excess amount of kleenex.
the sound of the swish when the kleenex comes out needs to happen more often.
And I don't know what else.

When we go on vacation, you will find a box of kleenex in his suitcase to use instead of toilet paper in the hotel bathroom. Where there is already toilet paper. so it's beyond the price, surely.
here's the best part: I received the following email today, sent to my family:

subject: Tissue alert!






Inbox
X





Van Shumway Jr

1:52 PM (3 hours ago)

If you call Craig at Day's Market (375-7960) by 2 pm Saturday, you can order a case of tissues (same as those at our house--160 count per box) for only $1.05 per box. That means your cost per tissue is only 2/3 of a penny. Minimum order is a case of 36 = $37.80 + tax, payable when product arrives in a week or two.







|

Ethan


replied, 4:20 PM (33 minutes ago)

Nerd alert!

Tuesday, December 1

wah

My last day was yesterday. ;(
My second graders made me a book that I will treasure for years to come.
Here are a couple excerpts.

This one is from Jacob:

"You were very good at teaching. when ye you read you did it so good. I felt like I was in the story. you are sooo cool.
love,
spencer"

here is the back of his letter:
it says "santa" with an arrow and "the bowl of jelly" pointing to his abdomen. sooo good.


One student wrote using only question marks. Like what he said is even a question. jk lol giggle giggle


They gave me hugs and/or fives on the way out.
Wah.

No update on the job...they are looking at applications right now then interviews later...I just made that up. but I know they were looking at applications yesterday.

But do you realize what position I am in?
I will graduate. on the 18th. no matter what. There is nothing I could or couldn't do to prevent it. besides dying. which is something I've considered. that's a lie.

So I am sitting around today. And if I want I can just sit around the rest of my life! Cool. Great thing to think about. Nah I'll get a job (using my degree) and pay off all my debt. Then I'll spend whatever extra money I make on travel. Then when I decide to actually save money, I will. That's my plan.

Wednesday, November 25

cookies left on my doorstep



There was a plate of cookies with a note in my bathroom when I woke up. My dad typed up a label, pasted it to a post-it note, then put the post-it note on the note. It says "Left on doorstep last night. Has male-idiot written all over it." My dad rocks. I found more pleasure in his note than the cookies and the anonymous one-page sweet note. And I knew right off it was not from a male-idiot, i'd recognize that calligraphy handwriting anywhere. my friend roxanne. which makes this even better. because my dad totally dissed my friend.

Love you roxanne, thanks for the anonymous note and cookies.
Love you dad, thanks for looking out for me. For taking the time to type up a label to remind me that I deserve more than male-idiots in my life.

Tuesday, November 24

I'm going to literally explode

I threw a popcorn party for my class today. A few hours later, a teacher brought in some popcorn from another activity to share with us. After she left, I gave my popcorn to the classroom teacher (Becky.)

Becky: Don't you want it?
Hallie: If I have any more popcorn I'm going to explode.
My 2nd graders were concerned and asked if I would really explode.
5 minutes later, I walk around looking at the thanksgiving books students are coloring. As I pass Jacob, he explains his addition to the book (The large blue person sitting on the turkey, pictured below)



Hallie: Who is the blue person?
Jacob: It's you, exploding!
Becky came over to see: What's the green stuff, is she sucking the apples with a straw?
Jacob: No, that's the explosion coming out!
I was laughing hysterically, taking pictures with my cell phone. It's my cellphone wallpaper. I am glad I have one more day so today didn't have to be the last.

Update on the job:
You. Reading this. PRAY.
I applied for the fifth grade position yesterday and the principal will be calling in interviews starting next week. PLEASE JUST LET ME HAVE IT ALREADY!

Tuesday, November 17

the next three days are going to be a never ending interview.

I don't know if this is even going to happen. but I think my principal is on the prowl for a new teacher. And I think I am his #1 victim. He came in while I was teaching a small reading group and he and my classroom teacher were talking about me! Come to find out he was asking when I was getting my teaching certificate and if I would be good in upper grades!! Then he was all "I may just pop in a few times to sit in a some lessons this week" Uhhhh ogkaayyy? I am feeling prepared every day when I teach, so I don't think I am nervous for things in my control. I feel intimidated. And sometimes kids will do stuff and it's like "how do I respond to you?"
But seriously oh my heck. These last three days. I have to be awesome. Because I might get a job here. I am on trial. ah. Stop thinking about it! It would seriously be the best thing ever though.

treasures

A student wouldn't sit in his desk. When asked why, he said: "My desk is haunted"

Teaching a small reading group, one of my favorite little boys that looks like harry potter (NOT daniel, the one I pictured in my head.) had a pink smudge on his glasses. How he even managed to see I don't know. When I pointed it out to him, he said "Oh, that would be yogurt," and let me clean it off for him.

Saturday, November 14

American Girl Magazine

Me: "Someone subscribed me to American Girl."
Dad, as if I accused him: "I did NOT!"

"It sucks to be you right now"

that is what my brother told me yesterday after I told him my plans for the next 3 months. He was joking, but he's got a point.

Here's my plans:

1. stay living with the parents
2. get a job to be a substitute teacher end of this month
3. get a job to be a full time teacher in jan when I get my certificate, if there are even openings. I will leave the county of Utah if I have to! That is a threat!
4. stay living with the parents

The only definite thing...is living with the parentals. The other things...just need to happen please.

I really love my life though! It doesn't suck too bad!

Friday, November 6

The 150th

I got a letter in the mail congratulating me on being in the top 15% of my graduating class at BYU.

I told my dad.

I asked him if he really thought I was in the top 15%.
"I'm not that smart" I said, walking away.

Shouting after me down the hallway: "Well, if you think about it, say 1,000 people are in your graduating class. You could be the 150th."

(laughing) "You're a jerk, dad." lol he always keeps things from getting to my head.

"Once I smelled sheepskins and felt like I was flying for a second"

Thank you, Jacob, age 7. We were reading a book about beagles and how they like to wear sheepskin sweaters. Then he made this comment. Jacob, you made my day. I had to leave the room I was laughing so hard.

Monday, November 2

addict

Nasal spray, Cough Syrup, throat spray, and dramamine. Then excedrin in the morning. I love drugs.

I was reading "Teddy Bear" with the cutest little boy in my class.
And I asked him if he had a teddy bear. He didn't. Really? Nothing? Not even a blankey, something you can't go to sleep without?
No.
I was surprised at my response: "It's better to not have one. You don't want to get attached."

Thursday, October 29

The perks of being sick

Well you get to stay home from school. And you get to sleep all the time and for as long as you want.
Then you get this mindset of "what do I do with all this time?" and do nothing with it. but you don't feel guilty for wasting time if it ends up that way. which it does.
You don't have to clean up. like gina is doing right now. thanks gina.
and...everyone treats you like a baby. which i love. (cough cough cough)
but to be 100% honest with you, which I think you will appreciate: I was really sad that I missed school today. Because I started taking over the classroom on Tuesday and my life is so good. Those kids are really nice to me and I like teaching.



Oh I read this cool thing to say to people with moustaches: "What's so important about your nose that you have to underline it?" Oh man I canNOT wait to run into someone with a stash and say that to them. Even if I don't know them. Do you dare me?

Tuesday, October 27

I butchered all my pants

So I have like 8 pair of pants. a couple black, one gray, a khaki, a brown, why am I listing this you don't even care.

Well one day I kind of lost it. I realized all my pants were too long. And they drag ya know? And it upset me. But my mom wasn't home to do it for me and I couldn't wait for her to get around to it. Started working on something. Couldn't focus. I just HAD to hem my pant legs! ALL of them. So I took my pants and I put them on one at a time. I measured a good couple inches beyond my heel and SNIPPED that point off all the way around. Snip. snip snip.

I've never used my mom's electric sewing machine. but it had thread that matched the majority of my pants and so I went for it.

No pedal. I was confused. But there was a button that said "start" so I pressed it. And figured it out.

Well it was really exciting, the speed of the needle and trying to keep up with it. Surprising, Hallie. One thing that hasn't broken that you've encountered. (patting ma back)

And there. I finished. But two pants needed hand-hemmed because the thread in the machine didn't match and I didn't want to go there. and it took forever to hand hem and made me anxious. Sewing machines rock too much!

Well I haven't gone through EVERY pair of pants yet. But. guess what. THEY ARE ALL TOO SHORT! I look like a friggin idiot every day. Good thing kids don't care. But Gina does and she makes fun of me everyday. Shameless.



So if you want to buy me pants, do it. size 8 petite/short. And you may comment curses to make me feel better.

Thursday, October 22

Gateway Discover Museumy

Today I went on a field trip with my 2nd grade class to the Gateway Discovery Museum in SLC.



blew my mind. And I fell even more in love. with. children. They just bring so much joy to life and I am really glad I got to play like a kid all day. And that is how it's gonna be the rest of my life! No way.

Monday, October 19

2nd first day this year.

First conversation I heard as 2nd grade students were coming in:

Steve: You're an amateur.
Jack: WHAT?!
(Steve runs away.) That's not a word you hear in elementary school let alone 2nd grade.

I look up during writing time and Millie is pretending she's blind. Then she does this tricky hand motion to her eyes and she isn't blind any more. It's really entertaining. She does this often.

Richard: "Where's Dallin?"
Brian: "I think he's got the swine flu."
Richard: "I hope so!"

My teacher has candy, cereal, and/or pretzels in every corner of her room. I like this lady. I put an orange and green skittle in my mouth at the same time. It's a good combo, try it.

Well she gives out like one m&m or one skittle for good behavior/finished work. This happens several times during the day. Before she hands any edible item, a student goes around distributing squirts of with hand sanitizer. I'm taking tallies tomorrow for how many times the students apply hand sanitizer. That'll be cool to see. Very appropriate precaution.

Sunday, October 18

rational

I was thinking about it in church today. How I have to do the Teacher Work Sample to graduate. It's due a week from tomorrow. Then I thought...what if I turn it in late? Like just whenever I get it done? They can't hold back my graduation date just for turning it in late. This is graduation we're talking about here. Graduating from college. No one is a big enough jerk to be like "hey, your TWS was a week late, you can't graduate."

lost and FOUND

Found it! I left my journal at church and the bombest girl in the ward took it home with her because she didn't want to leave it in the accessible lost and found.

Wednesday, October 14

nooooo!

Is there anything worse than leaving your journal somewhere? I submit that there is NOT!

Where people can just pick it up and read it? It's like leaving your soul behind! Here, just look into my soul and know everything I think about.

Bye 4th grade :(

I am exactly half way DONE!
I'd like to electronically say goodbye to Lindon Elementary. I will really miss those kids. How they tease me when I call the scissors "knives" and other accidental happenings that I can't think of right now.

Oh man those kids! Like the little skater boy who would always talk to me when he wasn't supposed to: "Miss Shumway, look at my emo eraser" "Miss Shumway, do you like my new shoes?" "Miss Shumway, smell this pencil." haha and another boy who was in love with me. And one boy that I avoided calling on because his comments always involved violence in the most awesome form. They all remind me of myself when I was their age.

I have three days off, the weekend, then I'll start 2nd grade at my sister's school! that. will. be. INCREDIBLE. What a ride I'm loving this.

Friday, October 9

I miss my daddy



The last day he was here, I got in the car to do something...probably learn how to put gas in the CNG car. (Or is it C & G? I don't know)
He had peanut butter in the middle console.

Pointing to it, I ask: "Just in case you get hungry?"
Dad: "No, I'm taking it by Lowe's or home depot."
He wouldn't explain himself, but he said it like it was so normal that it didn't register for a couple miles...
Me: "Why are you taking it to lowe's?"
Dad: "To see if they'll mix it up for me, have you ever seen them mix up the paint buckets?"
Me: "yes..."
Dad: "Yeah I am just sick of having to mix it with the egg beaters because it still separates, so I'm going to have em put it in the paint mixer and see if it'll stay mixed"

Oh man. I hope I get awesome like that when I'm old.

Thursday, October 8

Cinnamuhun Guhum

So ya know how when I chew cinnamon gum my tongue feels like I just rubbed it with sandpaper? Well does anyone else feel this sensation?

Sunday, October 4

Conferencial Cousin Times


My parents are out of town, my aunt is out of town, and my cousins are in town. So we took over my aunt's vacant house and watched conference. I'll list the 7 things I never want to forget about conference this year.

1. When I arrived, I saw 4 cousins and 2 people I had never seen before. I didn't know at the time, but one of those randoms was a recent convert, we'll call her Janice, and this was her first conference experience. Let's just say I ruined it for her. Probably made her leave the church. Here's why, a, b, and c:

a. During the first talk I tripped over something and started to say the d word but saved myself. Sounded something like "DAmdangit!"

b. A half hour into the first session an asian lady began speaking and half the people left the room for a snack.
me: "Just cuz she's asian guys, come ON!"
cousin 1 (female even): "No it's because she's a woman." Typical.
This was about the time Janice left the room. I didn't notice she left until later.
She came back after the session dressed up to go to the afternoon session by herself. As she was waiting for my cousin to get ready to drive her...

c. (K before I tell you what I did let me remind you how difficult it is for someone like me to sit through two hours of conference.)
I located a target: the light switch. Then I began punching, kicking at, and pretending to destroy this light switch. My cousins passed it off as normal for me, so I looked to see a fresh reaction. It's Janice, looking at me with a hint of horror but mostly disgust. When my cousin called to ask if she wanted to go to dinner/movie later, I don't know what Janice told her. But my cousin had to break away from us to hang out with her alone. DAmdangit.

2. Setting: Cousin 1 handing cousin 2 a piece of candy
Cousin 2: "I don't like that candy it's gross!"
Cousin 1: "You're gross!"
all cousins in unison: "Your mom's gross!" (funny because their mom is my aunt. so we are dissing our aunt.)

3. At half time, between the sessions, 8 cousins piled into a mini van and drove to the local grocery store. When we arrived, I spotted a cart with a toy car attached. I ran to it and managed (don't ask how) to get in. My cousin with a cast/boot on her foot hopped into the main cart. One cousin pushed us and the rest followed. We spent most our time browsing the drugs section. Eye drops...


4. As I write notes during conference, if I don't pay attention to a speaker, i write their name and put a "repeat" sign next to it, like one used in sheet music (:) Gina decided that was a brilliant idea and picked it up. A man stood up to speak (Kent Watson) and after only a few seconds Gina wrote a ":" and walked out.

5. President Packer, if you noticed, spoke from a chair.
I thought out loud: "He's next."
Cousins: "HALLIE!"

6. Cousin 3: What does "Balm of Gilead" mean?
Cousin 4: "It's like chapstick for your soul"

7. And my favorite. Alyson had the worst time staying awake. So she did these movements to keep herself awake. I loved nothing more than to catch a movement out of the corner of my eye and glancing over, only to see her swaying her arms, rolling her head around, or rocking back and forth. Like she was mental or something. Oh man good times.

Thursday, October 1

Happy October

I love this vid. (Click on "this vid" mom) I spent way to much time with Paint drawing pictures and writing in a poem for my class last year. Then my brother Ethan did an amazing voice for it and was hilarious. He sounds like 80 years old but he's not 80.

Please view to make the most of your October. Or die. You choose.

AHHHHHHHH

Speaking to my observer from BYU at school:

Me: Where am I assigned to teach next? (In two weeks I'll switch schools for the remainder of the year.)
Observer: Grovecrest. (In Pleasant Grove) We try to have one diverse school and one nondiverse school in your student teaching experience.
Me: Which of those schools is diverse?
Obs: The one you are at.
(In my head I am thinking of the two brilliant bilingual rich kids that they passed as "diverse.")
Me: If I want to be at another school, would that opinion count for anything?
Obs: I'm not sure, but I can ask! Where do you want to be instead?
Me: Westmore. My sister teaches there.
Obs: Well I can't guarantee anything but I'll see what they say.

TWO DAYS LATER . . .

THEY ARE LETTING ME GO TO WESTMORE!! I'll be teaching at the same school as my sister for 7 weeks! And it is the lowest funded school in the county! And there are as many white kids in that school as there are snowflakes in the summer. So diverse experience I will have! Yay. Love em. Love it. mmmmhm!

Tuesday, September 29

My dad feeds my dog 2 week old chocolate chip cookies from the grocery store for treats. They never got eaten because he's been hiding them by his bed.

Hiking Rock Canyon.

Passing a man that is taking it real slow...He's on his way out.
He starts talking but since my music is on in my ear canal I can't hear him
So I take the earplugphones out. Only to find it wasn't worth it:
"You're one of those tough girls."
I just like to hike. I don't like the gym. Gyms are for people that never get bored. And like the smell of rubber.
And you could probably beat me up.

Saturday, September 26

I am babysitting my nieces

And we just jump on the tramp every four hours and decorate sugar cookies with lots of sprinkles and play dress up then we do some sidewalk chalk and then take naps.

This is the life I agreed to when I was in heaven. none of this hard work/real life/career stuff.

Artsy.

It's funny how I'm all artsy this semester.

Like all August I picked up my dusty rusted string red acoustic guitar and I've been practicing...
(primary songs....I know. I just don't know how to memorize songs so I am trying to learn how.)

And I made these pretty chandeliers out of my new zealand shells. I should take pictures so you know what I'm even saying. But yeah every beach & each beach visit I picked up a shell. So if you can imagine I have a lot of shells hehehe giggle giggle giggle I'm so MAD I'm not there. Wait...wait a sec...yeah I just went there in my head and that was incredible.

Um just kidding I'm not going to take a picture because I just google imaged seashell chandeliers and I feel really lame now. There are some really awesome ones out there. Jerks. Oh here's one. Yeah.



Well now I am obsessed with music. I love this song called "Saltwater Room" by Owl City. And I got these free credits from some music store online so I bought some of their stuff and some of the arctic monkeys and I like them. especially their name. So arctic monkeys and owls...you know how it is...

Now my next art visit before the end of the year will be theater. Or dance.

BTW This is me taking a break from writing my "Teacher Work Sample" AKA "TWS" AKA Swear word AKA like my thesis AKA Oh man.

Thursday, September 24

hair we are!



It's called the "sophistication and spunk"

Wednesday, September 23

A kid from my class peed in a cup as a dare for recess today.

I Love "Wacky Wednesdays!"

Here is my schedule for Wacky Wednesdays!

Teach Mathematics (patterns? YAY! Love patterns.)
Teach Reading (Historical Fiction! Getting observed. And graded. But it's going to be killer good!)
Lunch. Enough said, right? Am I right?
Kids are at computers!
PE!
Recess!
Art & Music!
Library!

Oh boy is it excellent.

Friday, September 18

an intervention of my career path

Brother: Hallie, are you drunk?
Hallie: No, I've just had a long day and I'm exhausted.
B: well you sound drunk.
H: Yeah I just taught all day and the lessons were pretty demanding
B: I'm going to make a prediction. Do you want to hear my prediction?
H: Sure. (I knew what he was about to say...something about...
B: You are going to hate being a teacher. I teach adults at church and I hate teaching them. Can't imagine how much I would hate teaching kids.
H: I am just going to try this out for a year. I need money. This is a career. Everyone needs money. No one loves to work. (This is the only thing that is inarguable and would satisfy him/shut him up.)
B: Blah blah blah this and that I can't even remember what he said.

It's funny. Each member of my family has given me a personal intervention of my career choice. Like I am choosing to do something suicidal.
"Sooooo....what Gina's doing....you want to do that?"
As if Gina is on life support, hanging by a thread or something.

I am going to be a teacher. It's too late to change my mind. Plus what else would I do? Business? Ha. Art? double ha. MFHD (Marriage Family Human Development) K I don't even think those words belong together. This fits me and I'm glad I will graduate with a certificate and degree in 3 months!

Celebrity Collage by MyHeritage

http://www.myheritage.com/collage

MyHeritage: Celebrity Collage - Geneology - Family history

Friday, September 11

I am 9 years old.

Almost to Lindon Elementary School, my mom calls.
Mom: "Did you forget your lunch?"
Me: "Yes."
Mom: "Well I am going up that way this morning, I can bring it by"
Me: "Thanks, just leave it at the main office and text me."

I get to school early and tell my teacher "I am going to sound like I'm 8 years old but my mom is bringing me my lunch because I forgot it so I might have to step out and get it."

My mom in the main office, 20 minutes after school starts:
"What room is Hallie Shumway in? I'm her mom, can I just drop it off in her classroom?"
Secretary: "Oh no no no, we'll call her in."
Mom leaves, confused.

Sitting in my classroom during journal sharing time, Intercom announces: "Miss Barley? Will you send Hallie Shumway to the main office?"
Great. I thought I could get away with those kids not knowing my first name.
My teacher busts out in quiet, mocking laughter.
I leave the classroom and walk to the office like a bashful 9 year old in trouble. As I turn the corner, I see my mom walking out to her car. So I run out & yell "Thanks mommy!"

I walk into the main office.
"I'm Hallie Shumway"
Secretary, embarrassed: "Oh! I'm so sorry I thought you were a student!"

Thanth, Mith Thecretawy. I feew wame enouf having my mommy bwing me my wunch. Then you call me over de innercome wike I'm in fowrf gwade.

I walk back in the classroom. "Hi, Hayley!" One student mocks.
"My name isn't HAYLEY!"

Sunday, September 6

The social aspect of my life

If you put "hours per week of social life" on the y coordinate and "time since she's been back from NZ" on the x coordinate, you would see a slow but steady increase. I purposely dropped off the planet this summer. It felt kind of good to pretend I didn't exist.

Then I started going crazy. There were no more books to read or something, I don't know what happened. So I started spending time with friends. Then the social itch comes back and you gotta just keep getting out of the house or you'll go crazy. Now it feels good to exist and play with people.

I still need to work on initiating things. I have really loyal friends that invite me to stuff. I never have to do much, I just do what they are doing. So I think I need to have a party soon.

The trouble with me is that I always get a cold sore or a massive zit on my face that makes me want to not exist again. Like on a holiday weekend.

cupcake craze



My mom and I keep making cupcakes from cupcake books. The ladybug is a red m&m! They were so fun to make.

We were bored last weekend and made banana cupcakes. With real homemade butter-cream frosting. Which is a pretty long process! I feel so cool.
Here's a pic from online. Ours looked better.


I don't have pictures of those because they got DELETED WITH MY HIKING TIMP PHOTOS! Technology isn't always reliable huh.

Then while I'm on a roll here, monday at school the pta catered a parent-teacher volunteer meeting. They were serving these in popcorn boxes, on top of white chocolate popcorn. oh my heck they were so good.


It's fast Sunday and I'm on a diet. This is helping me get through.
I'm starting to like fourth grade...

Wednesday, September 2

4th Grade

I have been waiting to have a semi-good day to write on this blog. Because to be honest I don't think anyone wants to hear a pity party on sharing time! Right?

Well today was my first good day in a while and I like it a lot.
Why I had bad days?
Because I had/have a mental block against 4th grade. I was the girl everyone made fun of and didn't want to be partnered up with in 4th grade. Everytime I would try and play with others they would say "You're too hyper." I made friends by 5th grade and I've been ok ever since, but there is something about 4th grade kids that I just don't like very much...even a decade later. 4th grade is the last grade I would want to teach. I have more reasons but I want to forget about them so I can be a good teacher.
Today I taught math and instead of being intimidated by the students and by the content of the lesson I took charge and I had fun. It was a good day.

Wednesday, August 19

TOMORROW

Is my first FIRST DAY of school as NOT a student...ish.

It's going to be way cool. I've been helping set up the classroom and I've been to a bunch of faculty meetings and even back to school night. I think I'm going to be fine next year when it's all MINE!

Anywayzzzzz I am really excited and I am working really hard so I can prove to whoever I need to prove it to that I will be a great asset to your school. As a teacher. In January. To replace that pregnant teacher you have.
two scoops of protein and one spoonful of hot fudge with milk, ice, and banana blended in a bullet. does that sound wrong to you?

Saturday, August 15

the latest reunion


barrel racing.

adjusting the straps. the shortest setting wasn't short enough.



My gramma hovering over my dad, insisting that we talk about her ancestors when we were talking about my grampa's ancestors


good cousin times. Love them!

Transition Summer

This summer has been filled with transitions:
coming home from NZ
overcoming jetlag
a new ward
not living with single ladies
living with parents
looking for a job lifestyle
getting a job. which required a:
new sleeping schedule.
quitting that job after a couple months
new sleeping schedule
new ward because fall housing didn't work out
living with parents...always a transition
starting student teaching next week
the student teaching lifestyle...to be experienced.
I wish there was some kind of love transition in here too. I'll pretend there was.

Monday, August 3

A word to the wise...

don't try to walk outside in the middle of the day in bare feet in 115 degree arizona while someone tries to find the key into the side door of the hotel building you are staying at. No, there isn't any grass to step in, it is replaced with rocks, which are hotter than the sidewalk.

3:55 a.m.

6 sleeping cousins in a hotel room.
my phone alarm goes off at 3:55am (it's set automatically to ring on weekdays at this time)
I had earplugs in though so everyone else woke up then started yelling at me!
I finally heard it and switched my phone off.
a few seconds of silence...
I broke it with: "Welcome to my life every day."
more silence.
6 sleeping cousins.

Little glimpses of July


another priceless reunion pic from the cabin. strawberry shortcake



mom and me at mimi's
seriously you get a buy one get one free "just enough lunch" and get the soup and salad for like $5. best deal of my life.


Gina's concert where she blew everyone away but this old man took the prize. I have never wanted to hurt someone so badly in my life.


Oh this is just me on tibble lake or whatever. just rafting. Refused to button my lifejacket and my aunts got mad. Yeah I'm so living on the edge.