two spiders down, dozens to go

So last night I had to go to the parent's home and sleep there alone. because the dog needed to be let out and because i needed to study.
Well I went downstairs to turn off the space heater my gramma left on and guess who I saw in the basement living room after turning on the light? A HUMONGOUS HOBO SPIDER!
So I was really scared. Because I was all alone. usually with someone there with me I can act tough and get rid of it. but this one was really large! like as big as a silver dollar NO I AM NOT EXAGGERATING!
So I called my dad to ask where the space heater was and casually said there was a really big spider. He said I should step on it. Oh, right, and let it jump away as I put my foot down--then in my confused state allow it to climb up my pants and KILL me? So he said to throw a book on him--a large book. So I retrieved a phone book from upstairs and slowly moved my head around the corner. BAM! HE WAS STILL THERE. But the phone book was not heavy enough. a phone book would only give him a back scratch.
So I took a gander at my surroundings and saw a box of a dozen 16-ounce cans of tomatoes. Mmmmmhm! just what I needed. I stood outside the door of the living room, 10 feet away from my predator. The box in my hands started shaking from my fright. If there was a full grown man-eating murderer in that same spot I would have been more calm. So I counted to three and threw the box of cans from where I stood. The box slammed onto the spider and bounced back. he was SMASHED to BITS. So I told him, I said "who's the dead one now?" and jumped up and down in celebration.